The chronicles of neighbourly interference

Let’s be real: in many Asian societies, marriage is not just your business—it’s the neighbourhood’s business. The aunties and uncles who cannot remember your last name still feel entitled to comment on your marital status.

Here are some classic examples worthy of the Neighborly Interference Hall of Fame:

• “Don’t you need to settle down? Your cousin got married at age 25 and has children already!

• “Are you not concerned about being by yourself in your later years?”

• “All the good ones will be taken if you wait too long!”

• “I know someone who earns a LOT. You can just sway your leg and live your life happily you don’t have to work so hard “

Family dynamics expert Dr Sarah Thompson, a sociologist, attributes this interference to outdated social norms and an overly strong sense of civic obligation. Even with the best of intentions, this interference usually makes matters worse rather than better.

The impact of social pressure

Let’s discuss the repercussions: According to research published in the Journal of Family Studies in 2024, persistently bringing up marriage can have detrimental psychological effects:

• Increased Stress: Every family get-together feels like a pop exam on your life decisions.

• Strained Relationships: What starts as casual concern can snowball into full-blown family drama.

Isn’t anyone good enough for you? What exactly are you looking for? I’m exhausted from scouting boys left and right!”
(“Jasto bhaye pani hudaina,kasto chai khojeko ho”)

• Bad Choices: Hastily arranged marriages that are intended to “get it over with” rarely succeed.

Ironically, those who advocate for “timely” weddings sometimes overlook the importance of readiness and compatibility.

The comedy of “what will the neighbours think?”

The eternal question— “What will the neighbors say?”—is a societal anthem in many cultures. But here’s the truth: neighbors will always talk.

• Marry early, and they’ll say you rushed. Marry late, and they’ll say you’re picky.

• Don’t marry at all? Brace yourself for conspiracy theories.

The answer? Give up caring. As a cheeky late marrier, I believe:

“I’d rather hear the neighbours talk about my achievements than my marital status.”